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We will have Champagne tonight.” Ruth replied, “Jack, I love a full Scottish Breakfast in the morning. Can you take me to my butcher who has the best Lorne and link sausages? We will first go to Tesco as they have the best bacon. Then my butcher will vacuum pack it.” Jack kissed Ruth then said, “Ruth, May and I would love that. What a wonderful idea, how are your butcher's steaks?” Ruth replied, “Jack, they are wonderful, he hangs them on the bone for five weeks. They just melt in the mouth. When they are vacuum packed they can keep in the freezer for years.” They arrived at Ruth’s Penthouse. Jack was totally impressed. Ruth’s Bentley was still at May’s. After Ruth had packed they would go and pick it up. Jack had brought the refrigerated cool box into the kitchen. Jack had four bottles of Champagne and all the food and there was still room left in it. Jack was drinking a mug of tea with honey, he was sitting on the sofa in the master bedroom. Ruth was packing her suitcase. Ruth. When he stretched, he felt his BREASTS MOVE. Shit.Double shit, with runny buggers on it! It was a dream... WASN'T IT?!He rushed to the mirror - there his mother's body appeared. 'I lookawful,' Jeff thought, and put up a hand to smooth the tangled hair."What am I doing?" he whispered. Shit. Double shit. He had to pissbig time. He didn't have sixteen year-old kidneys any more. Sittingdown was so humiliating!After washing up, Jeff's former head stuck itself through the door.This Jeff smiled sweetly, and called out, "Time for you to start ourbreakfast, Mom!"Kids. Jeff thought, 'Why can't those kids get their own breakfast?'He slipped on his mother's mules, and clattered into the kitchen.Thank God, he had practiced in heels last night."Bacon, with eggs over easy, 'Mom'," said the apparent Jeff with a grin."Me, too!" sang out Susan. "Hang the diet for once!" Having herbrother make her breakfast was too good an opportunity to pass up.Jeff gave her a dirty look, but started the breakfast..
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